Are Your Decisions Truly Your Own?
You probably believe that you're making free choices and directing your own life…
It seems obvious, right?
You chose your beliefs,
your lifestyle,
your career…
"This is my life," you reassure yourself.
But what if an invisible hand has actually been guiding your decisions all along?
“The victim of mind-manipulation does not know that he is a victim. To him, the walls of his prison are invisible, and he believes himself to be free.”
—Aldous Huxley
In reality, powerful forces have been subtly shaping your thoughts and actions since you were young:
Standardized school systems that keep you mentally dull and docile
News media outlets that exploit your evolutionary negativity bias, keeping you afraid of the world
Ideological battles that divide and confuse you, pulling you away from truth
Advertising that exploits sexual desires while deliberately ignoring genuine human connection
A work culture that keeps you exhausted and financially constrained
However, there's good news too:
Throughout history, there have always been voices speaking to these issues. We know them today as the wisdom traditions, and they aim to reveal the invisible forces subtly shaping your life so you can begin to break free and build a path to freedom…
“To be shaken out of the ruts of ordinary perception... is an experience of inestimable value to everyone..."
—Aldous Huxley
The wisdom traditions throughout the ages have all aimed to bring awareness to the same fundamental truths:
Many conventional ways of living have become distorted, unnatural, and even harmful.
Freedom from these constraints is indeed possible, and we can again live with clarity, health, and connection.
For example, Hindu and Buddhist traditions say that we're caught in the wheel of samsara—an ongoing cycle of delusion and attachment. Our purpose in this life then, according to these traditions, is to awaken ourselves from the stupor, realize our true nature as interconnected beings of nature, and free ourselves through self-education and action.
In a similar way, Chinese Taoism teaches that we suffer because we believe ourselves to be separate from the natural world. According to Taoist thought, freedom arises when we release ego-driven striving and control, and instead live in harmony with the laws of Nature—the Tao. This means embracing qualities reflected in the natural world such as simplicity, rhythm, and presence.
On the other side of the world, Lakota traditions teach that suffering arises from disconnection from ourselves, the community, the earth, and Wakȟáŋ Tȟáŋka, the Great Spirit. For the Lakota, reconnection with each of these elements is the path to healing, the restoration of balance within the sacred circle of life, and ultimately, true freedom.
These themes don't just belong to the ancient wisdom traditions, either…
Modern psychology and psychotherapy aim to explore many of the same core themes as the wisdom traditions, but through the lens of Western science. Their focus is to increase self-awareness, identify unconscious patterns, and support healthier ways of thinking, relating, and being in the world. This is often approached through the biopsychosocial model, which views mental health as the result of an ongoing interaction between biological, psychological, and social factors.
The insights from each of these traditions are more vital than ever in today's rushed and distracted world. This is precisely because they call us back to intentional reflection, deep contemplation, and, above all, a more expansive awareness of self and life…
“The aim of the soul is, according to the sages of the East and the mystics of the West, to escape from the prison of separate individuality and return to the divine Ground.”
—Aldous Huxley
Although the wisdom traditions and the field of psychology offer inspiration, knowledge, and tools, one glaring fact remains: no one outside of you can free you from the distorted societal norms, mainstream education, and mass media systems that ensnare your mind…
No teacher will save you.
No spiritual tradition will save you.
I, as a mental health professional, will not save you.
You see—over the last century, and especially in the more recent age of TikTok and endless scrolling, we've become increasingly reliant on external authorities and devices to tell us what to think and how to live. These external sources have become surrogates for the real experience of thinking and feeling…
Instead of developing our own perspectives, we adopt pre-formed opinions from celebrities and influencers. Rather than sitting with the discomfort and uncertainty of growth, we outsource our emotions to algorithms that feed us distraction.
Furthermore, we're constantly consuming large amounts of fast, surface-level information, yet rarely giving it the space to be digested, integrated, and transformed into actionable wisdom.
However, insight without action is hollow.
Knowledge alone can leave us cold and mechanical, just like the machines that delivered it. And when that knowledge comes primarily from external authorities, we unknowingly lose touch with our sense of discernment, gradually becoming blind consumers of information rather than active participants in the world.
From an evolutionary perspective, we are not wired to passively consume information. We are meant to absorb it deeply, let it marinate in every cell of our body, allow it to mingle with our myriad other lived experiences, and then transform it into something new—something uniquely our own.
We, as human beings, are born to feel, to solve problems, and most importantly, to create…
“There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self.”
—Aldous Huxley
The path forward then is not about blindly following someone else's formula. After all, other people and systems can only offer a limited amount of guidance.
The real work begins within.
It involves taking action to create your own systems—ones that align with your unique values, rhythm, and vision. Although there is no one-size-fits-all solution, you can begin your path of personal freedom by…
Educating yourself. I mean REAL education. Embrace the title of autodidact—a self-taught person. Teach yourself to follow ideas sequentially, think critically, reason logically, and explore concepts abstractly.
Meditating. Train your attention and focus. The commodity of the modern day is attention, and if you don't have dominion over it, then someone or something else will take it from you without your awareness.
Getting comfortable with silence. Get comfortable with being in your own presence. This allows time for honest self-reflection, as well as deep contemplation of the bigger questions of life.
Forming an Ideal Vision for yourself. Create a clear image of your ideal life; this vision becomes a guiding star, helping every daily decision move you closer to where you truly want to be.
Forming an anti-vision. Make a clear image of what you're no longer willing to live with; this acts as a boundary line, helping you recognize when old ways are pulling you off course, and empowering you to choose differently.
Creating an exit strategy. Make a plan composed of small, intentional steps that move you out of old, stagnant systems and into alignment with your Ideal Vision.
Expressing yourself with fervor. Write with intention, speak with purpose, and express your inner world with precision; THIS is true power.
Showing up. Every day.
Finding the others. Seek out people who are on a similar journey, so you're surrounded with a community of supportive folks.
By engaging in this kind of intentional work, life transforms into a meaningful experiment where we take heartfelt action guided by our core interests and values. We discover what truly nourishes us and what doesn't, gracefully releasing whatever feels unnecessarily burdensome.
As we refine and organize these interests, they gradually crystallize into well-functioning systems that are uniquely our own—systems that support rather than constrain us. Through this process, we create a life that authentically reflects who we are. This is a life of genuine freedom.
Yet personal freedom is not the ultimate destination, but rather a new beginning…
From this liberated state, we can offer our hard-earned wisdom back to the world. We bring fresh insights to the conventional systems not as rebellious outsiders, but as thoughtful participants aiding in the evolution of Life.
And so the cycle continues, renewing both ourselves and society at large.
May we find the courage to question, the wisdom to create, and the heart to share our freedom with those around us.
Max Kristopher Komes
www.MaxKomes.com
Max Komes is a master’s-level mental health professional and author in Pensacola, Florida. His philosophy is that each and every individual holds wellsprings of wisdom within them, and with the right tools, can access this wisdom to live purposeful, healthy, and resilient lives.
How You Can Support:
1-1 Session: if you find that these messages resonate with you, take the next step in rediscovering mental clarity by scheduling a session with Max.
Free Mental Health Resources: if you’re looking for more mental health tools like guided meditations and daily journals, visit our Free Resources Page.
Join the Mission: with support from people like you, we can further spread these messages, transforming the age of confusion to an Era of Clarity. Pledge your support here.
This writing is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health providers with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. If you have imminent health concerns, please call 1-800-NAMI.
